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Some abusers (sometimes posing as children themselves) chat with children online and make arrangements to meet with them in person. Sexual grooming of children also occurs on the Internet. In the U.S., case law draws a distinction between those two and some people accused of "grooming" have successfully used this defense. Suspected offenders have used the so-called " fantasy defense", the argument that they were only expressing fantasies and not plans of future behavior, to defend actions such as online communication.
They may also engage in hugging, kissing, or other physical contact, even when the child does not want it. Commonly, they show pornography to the child, or talk about sexual topics with the child, hoping to make it easy for the child to accept such acts, thus normalizing the behavior. They might give gifts or money to the child in exchange for sexual contact, or for no apparent reason. Child groomers might look for opportunities to have time alone with the child, which can be done by offering to babysit the groomers may also invite the child for sleepovers, for opportunistic bed sharing. A trusting relationship with the family means the child's parents are less likely to believe potential accusations. To establish a good relationship with a child and the child's family, child groomers might do several things: They might try to gain the child's or parents' trust by befriending them, with the goal of easy access to the child. Online grooming of children via chat rooms and webcams is an area COST team officers are encountering more and more.
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